Daesy

I always though those females who got with guys who were in relationships where the scum of the earth. But i seemed to have gotten myself in a position where it can almost go there.

I have a friend that has been friend with me since we were teenagers. He dated my former best friend. They broke up and i didnt see him again until last year. We always had this unspoken lust for one another but we never acted on it, well, until last weekend.

He called me crying on the phone. Mind you, he has a girlfriend/roommate/worst enemy. I believe he loves her but he also can't stand her. Anyway I told him to come over. He comes over and says she lied and cheated on him with a married man. I'm sitting there listening and telling him that it might have been a mistake and saying everything that a friend should say. He comes over to the couch and puts his hand in mines and says, "Daesy you have been through stuff like this. You're the only one who ever understood." (Pause. I should have saw this coming. I was stuck on stupid that day.) "So then i said. Well thats what friends are for." His face gets close to minds and he kisses me. Ok so my mind is saying, "Uh Dae what are you doing?" My body is saying, "You wanted this from jump." We didnt have sex of any kind but if my mind didnt kick in we would have.

He said he wanted more but i can see this not going well. Insult to injury, my ex is his friend and he still likes me. Alcohol on the wound, his girlfriend trust me. Stab to the heart, I dont want a relationship with him. I'm not trusting men right now as it is. I feel awful, like i'm going to hell. I know it might not be a big deal to some but its a big deal to me.